Bio
I'm just another Artist ready to leave my fingerprint for all to see and say what the heck; then leave an influence and understanding to possibly see a path from darkness... Everyone is created with their own unique fingerprint. My main objective in life is to leave that fingerprint that shows I was here. To paint a path of existence that leaves a trail through this maddening maze of life. All so that someone after me can be entertained by my life and the work I leave behind, but also learn from it.
So to explain my art. I would say it is a bit like my life. Full of different, wide ranged, and varying stories. Of course after studying to be an art teacher. I would say, I had experienced and experimented with many types of genres and materials towards creating. I love it all. My more frequented materials is drawing, painting, digital/computer art, 3D and photography both digital and black & white traditional art. I would not necessarily categories my art in any one genre either. But my greater influences comes from Surrealism, Abstract, Impressionism and Comic Book styles of art.
Quick and to the point Bio and what my art is and why it is...
Okay, so where do I start? I was born and raised in Kansas City, Missouri. What I see and feel about life is what I do my art about. I have experienced a great many things in life. Nearly everything that I can at least imagine within my own perspectives. Including nearly dying a few times, to homelessness, to a consistent prospering job, to graduating from college and feeling the achievements of great success, to failing at dreams and fighting through the depression and anxiety of never being able to concur life or meeting up to any form of American society dreams and standards. As well as fighting through many various physical issues such as arthritis, degenerative discs, fibromyalgia, nerve damage from canal narrowing in the spine and having surgeries on both wrists. Never wishing to exchange the life and experiences I have had. For those experiences have given me a pleasing insight and understanding into what others lives might be feeling like for them. The way I see is very unique; in that I see both physical and spiritual dimensions. I see good and evil intent and activity. I relate to the effects that these forces have had on others. I find a deep emotional stirring towards the pains and glad tidings of others. One thing I notice of my self is the ability to relate and adapt to the lives and hearts of those around me. Not the mind of course, for that is to each their own. But my desire to love what is life; is what gives me life. Sometimes, I view alternate worlds working at the same time. But also I see distant universes existing in dimensions of the imagination far separated from our own, but yet carrying similar traits. Then just create what I see within my mind or on the paper/canvus before me about these things. Also I find an understanding that has developed from deep in my soul just how and why many things fight, coexist and/or flee from one another. There are many happy, beautiful and peaceful things in life that we can observe, interact with and be apart of. However, there is also many cruel, hateful and deceitful things in this world. That as well, we can relate to and become as one with in a similar sense. Then of course, there is also that which we bring forth, create and live through in ourselves. It is possible for many to get confused and lost in what the world overwhelms us with. My art helps me to relate and put it out there before me and others so that we might all observe and say what the heck. Maybe spark something good to life or lead someone out of darkness. I feel art can help many of us see the possibilities to influence each other on how we use our gifts and talents to influence others. I can only hope that for the majority; the decision is clear to help uplift and give insight rather than to destroy, deceive, belittle or tear down.
A tiny smidge of me historical background:
I was born and raised in Kansas City, Missouri. A fourth generation of evangelists, preachers, and teachers of God's kingdom. Also for four generations most of my family has done hardwood floors or some type of construction for a living. So to get to the point with that. No one in my family, for at least the past four generations, has ever seen a life with a silver spoon any where close to home. It also seemed as though nearly all in my family have had some sort of artistic bone. Whether it was with music, drawing, painting, sculpting or beautifully skilled labor, my family has never been short on talent. There has been ancestors throughout our family coming from many sorts of backgrounds. An Italian mobster, an Irish lady of the night, a Jew hiding his heritage, Cherokee that had walked the trail of tears, a Dutch Pilgrim that stepped foot onto American soil for the first time from the Mayflower, and many other nationalities such as French, British, German, Swiss, and only God knows what else. I guess you could say I have always considered myself to be your typical American mutt.
Hmm... So how about that doing life thing... Well, i am trying to write a book about it. My life that is. It has been, if its alright to say, one heaven/hell of a ride.
I first went to school 3 1/2 years at MO Valley to be an artist. First 1 1/2 years was spent being bad and not really learning. During the last half my brother and I both got on track with God. We started a little league wrestling team and also led a youth group. Then came our ministry the Yahweh Coffee House that started in 1993-4 and still goes today. Don't ask me how it still keeps going but it does. All I can say it it has to be a God thing. It's purpose is to reach out to the many lost and troubled youth. Mostly from the streets but also from castles. It's name location and overall success has evolved in many directions over the years. It is now called Yahweh Underground. I spend a lot of my time now volunteering and laboring at this coffee house to find ways it can help others.
Then after leaving MO Valley College I decided to transfer to UMKC but, ended up marrying one of the lost who was found through the coffee house. After we got married, we ended up living in LA, CA for about 3 years. It was a very educational experience. We lived 1 step above homeless and was even homeless for a time. There is way to much to explain right now but it is sort of why I am writing a book. I had made a living out there building sets for videos and many other construction jobs. Had even made money doing audience participation/TV stuff. She had gotten into stripping kinda stuff. LA slowly sucked her life out and nearly got mine. We hit another low financial point during a good run when we had our own apartment. So I chose to go to KCMO and make a little money and then go back. While here I thought she should come back with me and stay here for a bit then go back out. She refused to come back. Instead she decided that she would rather stay there with the Gothics and Vampires she had been hanging out with. Blah blah blah, it goes on in some detail and it is not an entirely a happy or pretty story. For one she neared death at least 3 times through overdoses and suicide attempts. It was really hard times and for the longest she was presumed dead. Thank God we now know that she is alive. I truly don't know what else to say about it for now. It is a lot...
Then was the time I lived with my cousin. It is another extremely detailed story. Basically, I lived a pretty hard life while I was with him also. I nearly died a few times while living there. Not his fault for sure, just mine. After I had got hurt in Party Cove at the Lake of the Ozarks, I started realizing again that God was trying to get me to do something with my life. I realized he was not going to give up on me no matter what, and that I should not give up on him.
Then I went to Guatemala on a mission trip with my Dad. I had went on this trip for 3 years in a row. Goofing around with the kids, doing some stuff to help their lives and just getting around to observe their lifestyles; all had a major, major impact on my life. It helped me to gain focus on what life is about. I decided life is about people. The relationships we build and how we can uplift, help and guide each other to love, light and awesomeness. On the second trip is when I met my second wife. I know that I should have probably worked harder on this marriage, but past is past. Our life views did not exactly line up. Her and her family had problems with my family. I did not care to much for such judgmental behavior. I had been there done that and seen the negative connotations it has upon life. Maybe it could have been dealt with and worked through, but hey it is what it is.
While I was with her for 3 years a lot happened then also. I went back to school which is a big mess of stories as well. Basically after changing my degree a few times I ended up with a major in art and minors in education and in theater. I was supposed to be an art teacher. However, after student teaching and graduating they decided to withhold my certification. I got in trouble for burglary when I was 18 in 1991. I had finished my education and graduated to get my certification in 2007. There was ways around it, but my life seemed to want being a bit more complicated than that.
During my second attempt at college; some things about my life physically began surfacing in full on disturbance. Which is why I changed my degree a few times. It was found that I have SLAC wrist along with carpal tunnel arthritis in my hands. I have degenerative disc disease, canal narrowing, bone spurring and arthritis throughout my spine. I had surgery on my left hand but decided against it on my right which may have been a mistake. However, it is what it is now. I have now gotten the surgery on my right. Which went from stage one to stage two and still continues to have issues. For one I need to sleep with wrist braces on every night. I have also been diagnosed now with fibromyalgia and some pretty bad nerve damage due to the canal narrowing and bone spurring on my spine. Also there is arthritis in my knees and ankles. Then on top of everything else I had developed serious issues with depression and anxiety. The depression and anxiety has gotten much better but still surfaces on occasion. I have a pretty full schedule with doctor visits all the time. A bit annoying I must say... Also let me tell you, It just flat out sucks... These are not issue that an artist or anyone wants to have.
I am good with all of it. I know God has got it. Besides, I have lived such a full life, I would not trade it. I have learned so much and can relate to nearly anything. Without these experiences I would probably be just another self centered @$$ hole. Pardon my language, but hopefully you see what I am saying. After getting through student teaching and being to pissed at the system to even want and jump through any more hoops I went back to physical labor. Which was building and painting theater sets, and doing hardwood floors.
Then I met my third wife. I figured I was not gonna go wrong this time. I chose someone that I thought was in between a vampire and a holier than thou type. Which is my short and to the point descriptions of my first two wives. She basically left me because; and well as she said, she deserved a whole man not a half a man or even a piece of a man. Of which, she considered me to be. So now she has been more of a pain than I can explain. She now happily has her whole man. Had him for God knows how long before getting rid of me, but such is life right.
I have none of my own children but, my last wife had 3 girls. It is what has hurt me the most. I love them very much. I hated my relationship with them being torn apart and disintegrated like it was.
By 2013 all of my injuries and overall tensions caught up with me. I even found it physically challenging in several different ways to create my art. I am a fairly determined person however. Giving up, I must emphasize will just never happen. I believe my imagination and artistic abilities guide me to the purposes of my life. I will create art no matter what, with nub, stick, mouth, mind, word, movement, and/or emotion. Continuously I keep attempting to find success in my art. In spit of everything I remain without work. Going through to much doctor/hospital crap sometimes, along with all the pain and disabling anxiety and depression; makes it just not an option for me yet. In 2009 I had to stop physical labor and then decided to turn my focus on God, the coffee house (Yahweh Underground) and my art. Most importantly I am finally pursuing that which I hope and believe is God's will for my life. I now live with my Mother, Father and Grandmother. Grandma has Alzheimer, Dad gets around on two canes because his hips and Mom is just worse off than I am with a whole list of issues. Yes, we are sort of a pitiful bunch but as a whole we are hoping to function well enough... It is all good. =)
I had applied for government help in order to manage and move forward with my life. The applications for that was first filed in 2009. I applied several times and even had a lawyer with all my medical records, but no help. At least I finally managed to get Medicaid. Still though no car, no income, and yet there are still bills, needs and yes even wants. Patients seems to be the key, and Persistence gets you there. We may all function a little differently, but in our own ways we have the chance to be equal. I believe that when dealing with all people we have to accept each individual’s personalized means of functioning. Patience, compassion, knowledge, and understanding are the most important tools in helping other people.
I also believe that art is a very important key to developing and building imaginative and cognitive abilities. It also builds hand and eye coordination along with constructive skills. I also believe that imagination is the first and very much so a huge, natural ability given by God in order to find our ways through a world of unknown without knowing a thing. All I can imagine that an artist could ask for, is that one would be able to use there imagination to reach out and touch someone, be it by mind, body, and/or soul.
